Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Such a gross week?

Is it just me or was this past week totally gross and disgusting for everyone?

My diet went out the window with a crash this past week, but at least today I find safety in my own paranoia of the fat content of mango. 

Yay! I'm back to my paranoid normality!!

I apologize for the obnoxious food porn!



Monday, October 14, 2013

Binge F'ing Fest

RIGHT NOW I am totally BINGEING on a breakfast burrito.

It won't stay inside me for more than another 30 seconds.



~stay strong~

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Watching Ana Movies

Today I watched some movies about anorexia.

You know what's weird, but distinguishes us as a community, is the fact that people like us can totally watch these movies and be relatively unaffected - and if we really do get anything out of them, it's more thinspiration and some new ideas on how to get skinny.

"Normal" people, instead, are grossed out or they cry or they say they "learned" something from it.

By the way, nice article for you guys today:

Hahah, I LOVE how this is supposed to be a health thing. Well, I found it helpful for my own intentions. What do y'all think?



Random thoughts, music, and today -


The above link is to Jamie Cullum's song called "It Ain't Necessarily So."

It's nice, check it out.


I totally failed in restraining myself today, so I am sitting awake late at night in apathy! Hoopdy woopty!

Tomorrow, I literally feel like I'm gonna eat NOTHING. I'll let you know how that goes...
(I'll probably have a sugar free Red Bull.)

Man I crave a fucken cigarette.

Ya know, lately there has been some really good thinspo being uploaded to YouTube. I felt really inspired myself, at least! I felt disgusting enough to want to be beautiful again, but not to the point where I'd want to harm again, like I did in past years (check out earlier posts...) - I am never cutting again! I just wanna be beautiful. No more. 
And so thin that you won't see me when I turn sideways ;)

I think I've been misunderstood
Not all my choices have been good
In the fading light
- Jamie Cullum, "Save Your Soul" (another song by him to check out if you like him.)


Stay strong!



Thursday, October 10, 2013

Yoga. Fun. Amazingness. Exercise. Yes.

I started doing Yoga again.

I feel amazing!
I feel like I am FINALLY back on the road to the beauty I always dreamed of and ALMOST had....


Tuesday, October 8, 2013

To Anyone and Everyone: Hello Again!


Like, two years later.

I don't know why I went off the radar for so long.

Here I am. Hello friends!
I read this really fantastic email from a girl named Courtney today. She wrote it almost a year ago, telling me how she found my blog, and saying I should come back to it.
She's right.

I don't know why I was "gone" for so long. I guess some times you just need a break from everything.

Well, here I am. I'm back. I'm fat - at least, I think, and I need to get my life back in check. I start anew today!
I wonder if the same people as two years ago still exist?
If you do, and you still remember me, please write me! Comment! Anything! I've missed you. And I'm late to the Thigh Gap party. Fashionably late.



My Thinspo Video

Who's Pretty Awesome Right This Moment: