Do you know what's worth fighting for,
When it's not worth dying for?
Does it take your breath away
And you feel yourself suffocating?
Does the pain weigh out the pride?
And you look for a place to hide?
Did someone break your heart inside?
You're in ruins

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky,
You and I

When you're at the end of the road
And you lost all sense of control
And your thoughts have taken their toll
When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul
Your faith walks on broken glass
And the hangover doesn't pass
Nothing's ever built to last
You're in ruins.

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky,
You and I

Did you try to live on your own
When you burned down the house and home?
Did you stand too close to the fire?
Like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone

When it's time to live and let die
And you can't get another try
Something inside this heart has died
You're in ruins.

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms
Give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky,
You and I

...I just thought I woul share these Green Day lyrics with you.
I watched a couple of my friends perform this song today, plus it was already one of my favorites, and they were so good!
I know a song means something when it stays stuck in my head for hours!!

So...I had a really good diet day a couple days ago as I said in my last post...but after that I went and screwed it all up. I'm not sure why...preobably because of hormonal change, plus I got really scared back in the mentioned-above day, when I felt fainting more or less throughout the whole day, and almost collapsed. I took it too far. Other than eating only 120 calories (which I am not used to), I also exercised hardcore for a couple hours. I need to take it more slowly.
But anyway, after that day I started bingeing on unhealthy things for a day and a half.
Yuck. Especially imported chocolate that my dear mum found....
I am so disappointed.
I need an Ana friend near me to slap me in the face every once in a while!!
I need to make Ana's voice herself be enough...

Positive side: I think I'm over that mini-phase now. I don't feel the binge need any longer, plus I looked at some thinspo and it realy changed my mindset. Also, all this running from place to place as well as "normal" portion eating really revved up my metabolism :D :D :D

I am ready for a fresh, easy, long-term start!!

Xoxoxoxoxoxo my skinnies!!

PS: If you guys find any new links to (SAFE) thinspo, please share! Love you!!